absence

now that years

separate me

from the horizon

that was

a teardrop held

breeze, an oyster

bereft from

distant dewdrop sea

an included winter

for every hour

that is

those silhouetted

fingers still

reach

the thought of

still has smoke

invasive teeth

careful echoes

their returning

bleeds

falling sweet

rusted rain,

interrupted ether

an empire of

indistinct hinges

never overcame

flute song in

heart strings

roar soft muted

a voice held in

ink dark dusk

refused silence

floats from gold

cornish shores

from whispering mines

trawler nets empty

of constellations,

come sigh across sculpted tor

over green silk waters

and creased basking sharks,

over cliff suicidal lids

to where, to where

longing wants to burst

all of it's colourful mayhem

red rushed rusting

and sentinels of bark,

autumn has a loose bough

splinters

knowing that i am

full of them

become the liquids

from a touch

behind the moonbeam blinds struck

my loneliness cuts there

i've swallowed enough pale daggers

felt your promise grow bare

stood beneath your fallen kisses

like a drunkard wanting more numbness

there is a hollow

not shallow

but oh inches deep

it shrieks love-me-please-whispers

there are no echoes

no hasty replies

only stillness abandoning

the heart's discarded space

cut

i consist of calendars

of hourly brokeness into

struggled atoms,

thirteen months wasted

vagueness is drab

lingering well kept sores,

rotten divorced corpses

it coalesces thought

plague, come feast upon carcass that is love riddled

and beyond drone repair,

plague, come sweet sickened syrup mines and

malignant crimes,

from either this tongue leaps

if only to tongue the coals of your hot mind

again, again

cut glass whispers shatter ten thousand

shard bladed

scattering like deformed stars fallen

from those plentiful in heaven

glistening like newly fucked lovers

sparkling in their sweat wines

do not believe in such skies

for no amount of cloud could i swallow

again, again

splinter man punishment

plunging thorn to where the heart is

worn and thirst anointed

the apprentice is silent

upon tear strobed bed

thistle gaunt stems for limbs

carved from obliterated sex

sexual edges are like

balancing tiptoe on a blunt pin

3 ml of discarded egg white

anonymous ceiling

mister cobweb chloroformed sundays everywhere

it's the facet mans despicable tongue

licking broken states of decay,

murdered perpetual roses

perfumes gone astray

come's today's great unveiling

a sickness assumes the person

you made a shell

one thousand terrible pictures

play under eyelid cinemas,

one thousand reminders

a mirage daily allows illness

to stay,

a fritillary of motivation moves

countless shivers to spindle, delicate disintegration

a clock's killed momentum

illustrates how many cuts

it takes to unravel a man

you are my irreversible cut, my

memorable squander,

i have achieved too many wounded pages

may as well be bone

for bone never holds emotion

a ripped song the sea has no name for

habitual window,

staring belongs

radar gazing

up to the head

with imaginary

fingers

this love abound in muscular

swells, treading above pearls and

the most tantalising skin

upon which i fell

swooned like a carousel spun thought

like childhood built upon too much sugar

we met where the sun's stray limbs

could not extend

we hugged where rays

became most dim

my first male mouth

raindrop softness

nectar's sweet slime, desire peeled

it's most inviting bleed

half filled dusk swallowed our corpses

crashing waves made our screams

this love, commences entanglement,

snares for years to be swallowed by

i stare too long

opaque windows

wishing

the heaven's broken

this love, swell floundered

beneath azure mountainous foam

there all heart forms choked

brimstone knives can't be quelled

forever's finite wording,

discard this shriek of

skin, shroud worthy population

become echoes of each person

hid myself as

someone else,

an oyster lipped

secret

into silences

infinite screaming

no song from

shall ever sing

me

slopes into dead dew

like waking thru' epitaphs

endless grey habitual horizons

permanent clocks

held back, discontinue

future

horizontal is for

slumber

oh to be inch deep under

slurred faces

passive opaqueness

greying paling everywhere

rust up to eyelids

rust in the hinges of

every red cell

ache less when sleep takes

the tide back into dormant seed,

under a hundred duvets, winter still

finds me

icicles

white extreme fingers

kill the energy engines

drain the mouth of it's

turbine wordage

down into silent lungs

pummel the spire that

was a man

slows the stream into aberrant gargle

leaf worried autumn retreats

into reached ice,

pulled at every axis

submit, compel

surrender to non committal ceilings

where most dead stares engage

sleep is my everywhere,

my bland lover,

my narcotic, sanguine mirror

my opaque empire, me

gone has the last fish

your rich abundance

tender and touched, me… caged

in honey jars awaiting the dip of your tongue,

held by a smile's watery promise

it blazes heat in pouring rain

threatening to tempest yet again

eager clasped jewels from autumnal's shrug

thru' skylight reflects your back scored with stars

shimmer like entrails of ghostly guests

crawl upon the corpse that is silent and watching,

and cellophane shivers deep as a divided touch

ceaseless as a root gone mad underground

no such honey length will sweeten me now

endless nothings guise dull mouths

empty as a vulture's gaping,

numb morning sprawls like a drunk

or is afternoon's drab sulking

these days it's hard to tell

one moment from the dead next

hollow days stretch un-climbable stairs

splinters piling sharp dew beneath tears

stared clocks, wished time vanishes,

sunrise haemorrhages into the smother

of dusk, and dusk illustrates night,

these days are eternal circle length,

ask fire of me

when there is none so bright as silence

all hours are fog

dank, they clamour like paws

gone has the last fish

gone the one body i yearn for

dear mr non exist

where am i now?

in a bowl like precipice

the desire to be eaten

quite overwhelms

and rain is gone of

the tempest that meant

it's fall, slow melancholic

cold

spurning

winter in the furnace

it's dark

and the wind is howling

a furious dog's bark

there's knives on the thrown breeze

sung air cuts like whimpering steel

confused smoke from coughing chimney holes

suffocates us with their ghosts

there are names upon the tongue

where words unspoken

and thunder crashes ten million shattering glasses

come quick and watch the world's demise

slow firework growl,

and good hearts petrify

i stir in my own echo

a wintry violence

where surrender knows no bounds

or direct aim

oh crack of ice

thru' sear of heart,

hurt is

scored with stars

snow falls

molten as it quietly fumbles inside

softly wounding

like thin intricate ponds

bleak, deserted beaches, kite-less

dog-less and bare

cellophane bleached skies

scream over waves to break

over silent shores deafening applauses

stroll on raucous shingle

and seaweed strewn hair

the wind is crying into faces

impolite tears

solitary figures shadow,

for being is desolation

not withered but waiting with groomed paws

i want blood to ruin,

it's oxidised stream too sluggish to move

intruded with ice scaffold

until such waters chill far beyond

coldness

it never does,

my heartbeats always prove

damnation to ice

dead horizon stare

of bodies so unloved

stretching from dire seas

like stagnant mountains topple

sunset chars remaining desire

into discarded ashes

but i'm roaring in it's cold absurd flame

cinder twisted

burdens of blond

blackened till recognition is beyond identifying

obsessed feelings

wind the coil

it's greasy cog cripples once

a spring about to strangle

and nothing gives

least of all bone

should someone ever dare touch

no one ever does

blue walls run slick with

tiredness and want

this ruin this lair

of exceptional cobwebs

a gossamer bed stretches

out for you, it's

emptiness billows

louder as ignoring

becomes bolder

this sweet sickening

over into medication

decay, it's odour erodes

the rose i pretend you sent

and love is strewn

like ripped up buttercups

love's lost guillemot

archways made honeysuckle

inflamed by bees scarlet untamed hue,

picture dust

remind me of you

the fragile architect

wants fire brought to archive,

cries love's lost guillemot

forget not never knots

even when love i

under grim soil rots

passions from mimicked kisses

the foolishness of hope and it's fickle wishes,

breath that spills aches empty

spaces, melancholic silences

the snows of love blow ever wilder

ever more abandoned

and you, my warmth dissolves and grows ever colder

the brittle architect gilds an illness

poison infused mind root

builds temples from splinters

to span the hollow from each cut

again

the waft from honeysuckle arches

an insisting incense

and memories grew

like pain

a love so besotted, dubious bent roses

stiff warning thorns

my sweet euphoria in lengthy swoon

a long avenging scorn

longing is thirst

like dry interrupted chalices

with cool dew in mind,

fleeced by grey

darkness is veiled

for you to spray light

waiting, here i recline

for your petrol to ignite,

and spider sprawl

between fingers silk throes

my mouth is spun

firmly closed

my eyes for you to glow in

until cobweb sewn

the drape of mildew

the lover's benign

all pretend

alone am i

relationship's end

it's over now

sunbeams are finished,

and shadow loosens

evening's tired prowl

journey deleted

like water tipped tom an ocean

leaving desert

lifelessness left to grow

all roads fall abrupt ends

all friends disposed of

where was hope

when happiness was defeated?

white widths opaqueness

a rainbow's deficit

floored petals to their

colourless deaths

feel the withdrawing splinter

made hollow for icicle givers

ignore headline grimaces

calendars that fall,

uneven months

disappearances

and the devil lies shoulder length

by sleep pale infused bed

watchful as a clock's patience

come to gauge despair

in each of every breath

and i, what of me?

what of this bag of bones?

shall bickering weathers gather

for rains to sprawl colder sighs?

vague faded summer

each flowered wasted

in cyanide filled vases

where have those cherished

glows gone?

stars lavish the creak

of each stripped bough

a flute-less bird

wants no manner of song

lungs are disquiet,

of glistening

dullness came

put out each smile

and departed

laughter

soon enough the sun rose up

bursting with fiery assassins

another day another suffocation

the same old bed to bury in

unbroken beam thru' curtain stole

time to find that heart

someone stealthily broke

feel me in quiet ebbing

so silent and shivered

i, in longing, silvered with

never to unend

the telephone screams

silver network

electric trellises

of want,

come throe of secure voltage

snare your most suitable guest,

invigorate the dna of your bones

disintegrated places

all are known to exist

in disintegrated

heart spaces,

a most twined worm

about the cardiac valves

wait and wait

the hours slow face

is drawn pale

paler than pearl or frozen skin

love winds and unwinds

a billion tangled nerves calling

said magical device

sits hunched like a grotesque child,

i'd lose my soul to hear you ring

be him… be him

a thousand phosphorous flies

would soar thru' veins

my glistening purpose,

cellophane dunes

sprawl

obscuring always

pieces of me more

mouth shroud, words

die upon the tongue,

dreams bluely kill their own

i sleep with demons

thru' out their piss stinking harm

and caligula stomached lairs,

despair sings to me a softness

of newly-fucked-swooning

in moments

the telephone shall rip itself in two

and pierce the air

with notifiable screaming,

who shall it be?

assassin, assailant, or him?

stale thinking honey drowners

and pours thin despicable disguises

over dreaming, stagnation

my hadean supper

my oxidised rant

all with schizophrenic

commas,

commit to the blood image

eyes wield ceaseless stare

thru' out the mind's unresolved fire,

another mad bird din

another insane choir singing

the telephone's continuous ring

you thru' television

from saucer or in cup

from dark cupboard glimpse

or in the vodka i just drunk

clearly oblivion wants us to suffer

you, curtain draft

or floorboard creak

i hear your boredom

chiming but

never thru' ear piece speak

it's easier to flit into sickness

it's easier to let the body fail,

irony sickens me

the love i hold

burdens me still

and the day does shrink

into a small, vast place

eclipse

love loosed an arrow

doubtful to the sky

it flew eons

until it's flame

withered,

exhausted, died

these dreams became an arrow,

hopeful

it's flight aimed heavenly eyed,

quivered, then turned dust

cascading sighs

the hot fireball wintrily insists

all should be bright here,

my hands cover your

flame wrought disc,

and you, for seconds

are eclipsed

the sun's fronds

decline to shine here,

half shrugged in shadow

unreconciled,

darkness beguiler

here am i

blackness wrapped

unseen and so

eclipsed

"all is not lost" soothes an angel

his voice loosed silk arrows

cruising towards my dissected heart,

i place an arrow onto each string

and fire such wooden limbs towards the sun

hoping someday it will crack, i wish and wish you back

a symphony of discord and strings

friday yawned eager, gleaming imminent arrival

the evening spell fell hushed like withdrawn breath,

shivering, first fleshes, a precious glimpse caught

and shadows lengthen, we greet with sighs and secret signs

thus the symphony began

strumming the body senses numb and blind

and thru' the city's writhed intestine

we sped like speed demons

chasing, thirsting after each other's thorough blood,

twisting thru' streets

inside hot veins

round exercising hearts

shard like thru' the brain,

we drove thru' the outskirts

and into the hub

of a cobweb den

foiled with jewels, reminders of rain

thoughts made flesh

such beautiful sinning

waterfall you

come cascading

in shimmering grains

below skin

a symphony strum of strings

one thousand violins raucous din

a cacophony of drums never silencing

slow until perpetual dawn

where the skies blood lines red are drawn

unlike friday, morning reeked a stench of sheets

sweet sweat, a sweeter kiss imprints skin like autumnal leaves fleece,

the wish made vaster than dwindling dreams, how it bleeds,

a promised hint, around our door i see stale roses sprawl

should have known misfortune was soon to call

thus the symphony grew

once edible jewels, bore it's beguiling fruit

thus began the harsh song disquiet

hurtling thru' nerves

chilling mistaken love, spoken frost tongues,

ice-eyed-whisper-minds

cravings from within cranium

it's ache divides incoming rootdom

we and i sit quite alone

by a sea's misunderstood swoon

despair drowned mermaids

broken upon their seaweed throats,

every whim of weather

turns stormy towards minds

pale bolts flare dragonfly spurs

and hurt comes like

a hard unloving fuck

fathoms delve

irony of skin

the screech sound of wayward violins

begin to bell,

on fire a funeral pyre

for us to freeze in

the morrow of yesterday's stain has grown bolder today,

what will cobweb daydreams bring? they haunt the silent cage,

me noosed in spider's strangle, a butterfly coerced

struggling and so in love, so in love with you,

the ivy of your limbs shoot roots, wept from you into me your

symphony

the symphony in full obnoxious swing

it's desolation, blindfolded suffocation

harken to delirium

it enfolds cursed sleep

and thru' it's tired, tired veil

meanders thirst caused beast

thru' conifer sculptures of bone

soft hints drown moons

until the vision fatally swoons

here the explicit dream

is honour bound

to do my bidding

so on your knees

we never touch, we never speak,

eventually to wake is pain enough to know that this was never

real

pacing remnants

where once sang blithe

brittle quiverings,

fragile stands the broken man

almost destroyed

a quarter of the man that once was

listens to nothing in particular

a symphony aperture of scratched strings and devil's scorching

twining aftermaths from someone close, is discord,

listening to nothing in particular, except mind roaming echoes,

your breakdown sperm has conceived me, it's filthy womb

loneliness is waiting for the rain

it's lonely waiting for the steel clouds to come

***

epitaph?

we so briefly touch

like mist, fog or under dust,

the shadow of your inert spills

like a personality split

cut from my trust

where guilt follows it's own discordant blood,

you in me do charter

the body's course,

more than i care to admit

unloved is a vow

keeping the heart's liquid

nitrogen cold

how the mighty have withered?