because i have demons

 

bleed




slow dive molasses and wish lips inside lips

frozen icicle kiss waiting it's

sweet damaged sip



hungrily seas eddy thru' out

remnants, pieces fragmented flashes

guillotined memory slices

explicit dreams abandoned from

every restraint,

fountain me into mouths

spiralling down throats

under skin, inside joints

stretched taut across voltage sung bones



but when touched

we blow apart

vow crushed beneath stone thumbs



the stars jewel-fully pluck

and you breathe turning fathoms away

from me



the swish from clandestine dreaming

pulls wayward from sleep's groggy empire

an almost crime scene

it's victim unseeing



staring into once deeds

of blackness shivered fingers

ascend the spine's ghostly glide

you i mostly crave… be mine



what foolish keepsake doubters spurn,

he is fallow and dead spring

his crown you'll never wear

but be well bruised under it



cobweb catches each spun thought before escape

and yearns them to burnish brighter than scorn,

deeper than love those roots do tap his fleshy soil

there be honeyed treasures in tear ducts

if i recall but always recoiled



seconds kill hours

creep slow as a declining heartbeat,

this heart enrobed in rot, would you

with fingers dig?

i think not



splashing ruby jewels

i bleed only for you



slow train drew in like sad breath

winter worn, winded and drenched



slowly grew the parting chill

eyes like inert rainbows

they burst to be the sky

thru' out  the rain's relentless blows



fast train back home, thru' childhood fog and thru' cancer

twisting inside of blackness

hurtling blind towards an unknown abyss



didn't quite see the car that sped in front of me

never quite felt the ghost from his numb body



i, my lover, twisted in eyes




i and a mirror

glare for hours,

upon moon schemed skin

kissable and touching

faces push thru'  and deeply in



thru' glass looking

sneers back past,

in camouflage traitor sparks

an ugliness trapped

but gorgeous beneath it's

tapered heartless mask



splendid glare

a liquid spilt star

covets all the scars

blinded by silver

and swooned by it's mouth



swallowers reflection

besieged jewels glimmer

but all that feels is persistent winter



this turtle illusion keeps on hiding

bending silent affection

twisting all limbs

to statue falsely



bodies are truly open

crouched in your skull

my colour is your colour

absolute perfection



colour of sperm

paler gleams whiten sometimes

feeling special blooms,

crooked flowers crane necks

lifeless and wooden feeling

against flesh



flattened sparkle lit waves

scorch whatever friendships made

abound me, surround me

shapelessly opaque



see myself, god

it's copy unclear

sometimes a demon in it's place



a mirror and i

exchange quick glances

a perverted rose laden

with obscene romances,

i amongst it's polish

pull, contort stretches

a face towards thorns



i splash silver torn tornadoes

all tear clothes

and shone shards,

small red splashes run

painted maps upon jagged catches

of the routes i've been



in your silent anorexic stare

i am nothing and everything,

can you see?

not quite i hear you shimmer



afraid of the beautiful stood

oh jealous narcissus

it knows i dream of lepers

secretly it has made



turned it's monsters to thwart me

from tireless angels into

all consuming rapier snakes



twist, and we all twist to,

i always, always follow you

warm as frost

my name scrawled upon breath

carefully upon bodice etched



what do i see

replacing me?



a mirror fixed to a stare

bloated and so overloaded with stains,

dare to look again?

 

 

pyre




good morning radio hiss

interrupts incompleteness,

clock sombre speaking rips


it's screaming fire engine rings,

eyelids open, the world twists in

stained slivers drunken eyes,

the chill that hangs the heart his angel whim

seeps from the floor to the head his ceiling



faded wallpaper

a gone off sea staining,

peeling photographs fading,

ghostly clothes from lover's gone

gone off scented cold, cold room



unbreakable chain forever draped

it's rusty lock catches awkward a careful neck

cutting as any sharp memory would,

he choked and sorely aches

when thinks of restraint and it's pollen cage

mistaken for a genuine place



turning towards eye-less-ness

groaning mattress protests,

tired, tinder delirium

his heart explodes blindfold

dead affection,

frozen thinking all might have beens

in such jaded dull worlds

ugly phantoms roam



each morning would crease anew

to warm his blood completely thru',

from bleak sheets rise, stretches

then stands upon the scuffed carpet land mines



this world of brokeness, outside coldly

disfigured by a window's permanent gaze,

like an old man worn

autumn drags it's tired corpse

leafing it's tiniest skeletons, their frail masks

forgot, silent and searching, searches for warmth

sadly smiles and feels frost thru' the shoulders of years



sharply all burst

the horizon gave way

a blunt puncture

be lonely no more

a bedevilled urge thunders

into the deceit of fleshes



"i feed you when orally most challenged"

"spill with dew to quench deserts that are driving"

"i'll tend to bruises and bloom most deviant nooses"

"fill your head with almost cloud, and

star glossed infected semen

will twist you bodiless with their pungent same coloured paints"



"i am promise, the vow that was never made,

that unleashed hope i blew upon to grow

to feel him be him clothes"



it's a sickness to persist inside it's

purple broke kiss,

was i so ceaseless that i

never existed?

it's a reoccurring visit

enduring damnation

incurable as decapitated crocus

depletes



i'm face down upon a mound of bodies

peculiar fleshes heaped in stiff stale mountains,

one drop of lust one grimy affection

ignite shall these slopes of skin erupt

we flow hotly golden down this inhuman hill

twisting, mouthfuls lustfuls fucking

until we river cool shatter,

these pictures fond scrawled inside the medicated blow

stir from the hospital bland bed



the falling star shone briefly for seconds then was gone

neither it's wake or recalling where it fell

could rekindle wishes or resuscitate it's dream

the blip of the life support machine,

another heartbeat, a blue flaming tube, sucking then withdrawing

tidal breaths cold and ignoring, a light red winks

then startles off



the imprint of dust
that imprint us



poisoner




home, still and quiet creaking sounds

like mortuary abode or cemetery grounds,

a draft, a phantom's shifting whisper

awakens dust from burial into stirring shivers



bemoans a ghost indifferent in life

thirst-fully cursing it's narrow prism

tells of pain, of lovers failed and betrayal,

their bodies, larder hang, emblems of backward times



the swayed hint weeps it's

promise of sweeter things,

there's nectar in these hinges, on trickle,

sorrowfully calling to whomsoever yearns



it yearns to drown their handsome skins

in sugar sticky maelstroms,

a sea that ocean's nothing

but volatile suffocation



bitter, lips uncurl from dead kisses

full of salt, gorgeous only to cut a thirst,

empty as hollow as fallow bone marrow

emptying your echoes down thru' my throat



where are those heavenly holes

places for angles deep down?

how far do we submit

to feel rapture, golden crowns?



should fingers like slender leaves or needles

extend thru' all hidden places

where light fails to seed

for sharp tongues to make their own?



befriend affection the same infection

desire bloats tide ripened

it pours loneliness downstairs,

in it's glare trapped masculine stare



wordlessly

hopelessly

strangled



the pounding heart alcove revolving, involving

buoyant explosions

another glass of wine?

or a cup of blood? my blood?



come sip my eager veins

unzip blushed epithelium

climb in thru' this ribcage

make moan my haemoglobin



sound the spire's highest bell

it's single note the loudest quiver,

infect this jaw with rawest honey,

outwit the lonely spell's winter



"would you care to stay the night?"

unleash this corpse back into life



his limbs push thru' the coffers of warmth and wealth

always roots firmly growing further in

before elapse of breath or eyelid blink

his body grew silent, statue like to my mouth



same resurrection

each day waking sore

intoxicating more, it violates lungs

i thought was breath



the clown in asses skin

made to believe a handsome king

scattering jewels to the sly assassin

as if silent repayment



the bed now ungracious nettles

no longer crown adoring but crow denouncing

untouched glances and necrotic romances

perfection is turning tiger into toad



i always shape, i always bend,

"you're thirsty" implies the poison friend,

"drink this sewer commitment"

first sip then swooning thru' absurd drunkenness



stare ceiling then to floor

whose bed space do i lie upon?

remembering anyone anymore

the sounds of fucking next door



portraits of venom where once there was wonderful,

someone covered in bliss scampers to the bathroom,

to the grey of morning spits me stain worthy

like this dark world i wintrily roam aided



tearing pieces from this sky

numbness is something i have eaten

the hardware of this heart throbs on empty

turns to me for a transfusion of the pocket



wound upon the limb that no longer sticks in,

your eyes are purple betrayers and scorch me where i grimace

you'll not forgive unless i commit swallowing

when does the floor become the dirty ceiling?



there is no feeling, this house all muted mouth murmur

sinister windows glassy stare, i am thumb under

fragments and always drinking

it's the only way i know of sinking and being obliquely near him



obituary rewritten reads

"was average in his day"



for you




make flute-less the dew wrapped mouth

so that impotent sound is made

like a lover bereft of intimate wonder,

dry of nectar, sucked, an over sweet dagger

of jagged sugar, refined oozings till

elixirs of poison so lovingly stale

it's honeysuckle wreathes sucker those

into absolute head rushes and free falls to have

their backs crippled across stone arches or

their minds carved, loneliness but only one half



silence could only bare to utter

so infused was i with roots too

tangled to disengage, each knotted finger

holds slivers of down pointing knives,

one gleam enough to rend a man

in two,without is to have my senses

banished, without you my horizon, heartbeats vanish

that one breath seems quite obsolete



do you in steel glare cherish me

like blossom blown in tornado throe

or spidery jaws puncture startled fly?

the way your feigned once our tongues were entwined,

but emptiness fills the fullest of lust

and dedicated pearls smear stuck jewels,

i urged your sick touch and was scorched

fatal paths tempting venus traps

there was i star sharing staring on my back



stir fossils from subdued permafrosts and make

memories yield from ghostliness so overly

forgotten that bright eyed hate is stoked

and brought to the fore of

daylight, moon shone nights are where

i posed like ice, and clay stood for hurt

to break it's silent slaying, the very

thought that thinks you will not die



tonight, midnight i dreamt i breathed you

an angel spun spinning visions upon jagged tongues

but desire, no explosions came

a forensic touch that never was

i fell onto floors no sky could hold upright,

lifetimes crackle with fading

but no one notices where we disappear to,

another empty hour corpses, forgotten

there is no forward direction to pause in



an over glanced clock appears faces

dust resonates to it's own quiet remaining

it's oblique past time of rain, hours spent

listening for, then he came with flowering

things and faking, autumnal rust

for the taking, come dew insist my flesh

and taste until these moments are wasted

all purrs and pushes familiar as hatred

you flicker, vanishing, cracking the make believe

we loathingly made



midas



i am king of my own bed

i survey it's ripped sheets,

it's wayward ditches

damp aftermath creased



smeared skies onto

frayed patterns



an emperor stares bold

over stricken holes, a protein

field, a wilted stem emblem

stain arranged semen allegiances



sticky victory salutes

where hearts were drained

and glow about the

post cigarette halo



guzzled from brown coronets

this severed sleep, splits mind from

mouth until the laziest heralds

stale breezes into seeping molasses



each finished finger

each lovelorn dent

mends hurt copies

a stratagem learnt



i am lord of my own sex

a revival of instinct, i twine

the strands that incite fleshes

to rubiest indecent shivers



it's faded pleats

hang limp off corpses

that appear now to sleep

old copious pearl ropes groped



of the gaunt infected

their ant buzzed bones

want to grunt, to

incorporate other swarms



that lust buried flavour

commits their male cunts

to borrow more,

a rape worth of locusts crawl



oh edible jaws suck kisses

are shared, each festoons

prized fissures, whose the

first to exit soaring?



this smile tho' shark winning

is a tooth into grimacing,

beguiler, hire out the heavens

sad maybes seldom ask



"who or what you are?"



all fleshes are same'd here

wronged here, shapeless

and fuckable dark lit

fixes, so fix my blood further



i am prince of my own

deception predate the

groans of others

taking, taking



the cancer tree




endless pier days filled with ice-cream that

stretch forever vanilla there,

crumpled paper space ships acrobat upon the sequin

beach sparkle,

we give chase



jewel accosted salt welcoming sea

reaches us with foam hands,

warm amber spills

thru' lazy kites and

we gaze back



upon towels beige and ink mum and dad sat

we panic wave and

again give chase

catching dreams pinning each to a moon

that soon will decease



silhouettes from seagull sprawl, fall oh

too soon, from crystalline cobalt eager beaks

come to taunt to harass make believe

to vanish such child like architecture,

i glance back, mother, father gone



i fully grown stare nothingness black

our shadow we'd gladly forsake

to ease the soul's dispirited nectar

to undo the dna assassin

i of teenage weeds



i never truly understood the elm of

father's stance crippled by so many

dark birds, stood within a tornado's thirst,

into another's arms cradled like a newborn

or tender farmer carries a sheaf of corn



we drag our tired tantrums and

dented spades home

along paths early september snakes,

twisted bouquets wait to

confetti their rust, their illustrated sickness,

our sleep betrayed eyes refrain

from being closed,

this cartoon of mine



i climb father like a squirrel in

the bough of some invincible tree

and pull upon easy branches,

careful of thorn like symptoms

tug at his bird nest cheeks,

he twizz's me around and faster

become a carousel of my screams,

we fall acorn peril but

safe in his gaze apparel



remember that tree, robust browns

and healthy wreathes, to the sky,

to the sky, dreams began to reach

to follow azure ghosts,

a shriek of cells about

their solemn murder, where once

his fingers sang my laughter

clay dull eyes compose the

see thru' figure



remember when illness came to visit

there were no bargains, no plea's,

we offered cakes and other childhood bribes

liquorice won't achieve departure, no

fantastic dragon can chase the elaborate

plague your cells are shrill with, this

vow of sickness stayed for family

fragments to feel, to become



softly sighing




the night bird stages melancholy well

from within a cage made mostly of holes,

and perishes



weeped ether sucks

when the least hard hearted beats alone,

aching is from within yearned wishes



she turns to kiss

and touches emptiness,

into bled black her cracked heart slips



dusk worthy a man speaks slow

from ink drunk shroud made shade

and quietly cuts himself



there are lonelier sounds

real as desire achieves only furtive sparks,

pain is robust within it's own hurt empire



regrets are unfulfilled yesterday

share yourself upon stale cobwebs

dreaming of his own death



there's petrol gleaming inside lonely veins

blaze me into indigo ashes

blaze me into purple blinding



this is my own dashed mirror

pubic hearses in protein

unravelled bedrooms



hearts on howl

each predatory hormone on

distinctive prowl



bliss is wrong

on sunday's patrolling yawn

churches will burn the calcium off your bones



finger the abyss

blank roots grope

into circle turning loneliness



eyes mouth openly for fragrant visitation

till dream fastenings break

turning colours into shame



all statues should appear the same



this is what loneliness brings

when kissing pages of gloss nothing,

bodies without name



emptiness rivers inside

staring at it's vast ceiling,

it's bland expanse goes on forever



each clock face

winces time leaked grimaces, it's

own horizon a never ending cut



wanting a sunbeam's promise



why are wishes never met

because demons use it's

very bleak heart



you, i, brother, mother, father, sister

softly sighing all the time

to hope our wishes maybe sighted



instead of always met blind



inside the sky




slow eyes

inhale fountain's

spilt light,

sleep's breath veils

the body the mouth

longs to bite



oceanic pearling awaits their

foam tonight to burnish into

the brightest chrome a rush of opaque seeds



fingerprints always follow home

into the most secretive of traces



no snarl of traffic

snare, no noise intrusion

anywhere but synchronised

sighs in tune with

blood written waves



like newborn in loving

maelstrom

like the man startles

bewitching you

lips into silk

slick croon



re-enter the bluest ocean

of them all,

amethyst lazed surfaces

push up skyscrapers,

rain splashing one another's

mountains



until white gusts

burst,

loving someone

too much

hurts



swoon thru'

eye lit

magnifying atoms

into wonderful planets

intimate fingers

over groaned heaven



tremor

it's roaring hush

plummets

kisses spark blue voltages

the horizon into

melting



drops the head

bejewelled between legs,

innermost

engines whir

sublime



uncurl

flatten

into horizontal statues

commit

to sharing slumber



until,

until

whitening daybreak

thunders



he is sung with

stars

frozen into a pose lovers make,

every foreseeable

disintegrates



you my entire sky



belabore




paling affection

grieves death loudly,

a shroud's incoming tide, incoming ashes

aches sorrow, from now all are hollow,

it's sun fell to cinders of nothing tomorrow



oblivion he thinks is the closet ghost

closer than obsession

and other such breeds of frailty,

like love, it's stupor trust, hatred and reoccurring pain

loss is forever my shoulder watching companion



he possesses this phantom



a love once clean

like beautiful willow sways, admired at,

disease sewers across it's wrought leaf lore

canker at it's scar furnished heart, a cancer

congealed like gelatine sets, eyeless stare those in fixed howl



forgeable bonds from loved ones

like a child cries fearful of the ink bled dark

guided by it's father towards sunshine

only to find an ill lit stair, a liar's illusion

there is no sudden sky to hold such light



the besotted god to the violated and the lost

the despiser, the belittler of angels

futile mending renditions begin to plague,

love strengths blow migraine maelstroms

a tornado twists on down thru' our mouths



"to dream away the lives of others"

the dreamer has lost his fabled skin,

tired from the weight of mountains

finite moments collapse into being dead,

here am i roamed with obsolete fingers



beset by evening's shrug of chills, it's silence rehearsed

into falling shivers, a lark assumed to be the victim of a fox,

it's body ripped raw and wreathed in blood weathers,

the sightless clock mutters away our wasting lives

an unread smile delivers poison upon it's tongue



we turn in separate worlds

the porch glow worm jealous lit



"how much longer?" he grimaces this clenched wish,

undone the knot that took years to ravel



pieces threadbare floor strewn like sad unopened presents

colour has ebbed from this portrait of bliss

how can we inside the same rib cage coexist?

the body of judas floats this oasis of piss

where once nectar explored our blood



"i'm cold and weary, it feels like the end of floors"

that night we tore thru' the mask we so kissed upon

what devil in angelic corpse was that beast

guised in falsehood truths,

photograph albums are full of stained venom



remember when we first held hands, the ignite of atoms

awkward in the bronze laden park,

the smile that swallowed me and time

always made me petal torn weak,

remember how the body smelt

during throes of sex,

swooned and sighed and breathed each other's breath

fountains ether sublime within our shared minds

our thoughts siamese as one



odours of honeysuckle trickles bland

this overly sweet seething summer night,

in sickening daze vile perfumes cloak

the pieces deceiving from our hearts,

falling as decay does



"i don't love anymore"

feelings for you, quartz,

the light is turned off

we turn in separate darks



"i'll never let you close again"

my heart too full of holes



everything, the windows, the walls, the world

ripped to it's suicide, inside this infection

malign and pushing with jealous brain

"you body is mine to rent whatever affliction"

"i have murdered cupid next to the chair

we tied our souls to be this in love"

it's all broken bruises and

slow cunning mildews come to wither

to ransack thru' bones

this re-murdered rose

pulled under for gulping fungi to

pile their albino moans,

tears like his nails

deep sought scratches, small cuts, penetrating



television limbo snarls

punctured rooms, teardrop

confetti wretched upon reeked anger,

the front door an already wound

out there a seething wall

of sound disquiets



inside, torn facade

the imprint of a kiss wished

back upon skin,

and the quiet scream throes on

an aftermath abattoir,

within this stale house a voice

is on echo

here now is ghostly evidence

except the slow rending of

flesh wrenching further apart from it's

own despicable and honey free heart



the mender




there is cruel jagged

there are scalpel glances

and hard interferences,

interrupt the night

by soft lament be crucified by



in small splashes

or great cresting waves

denial

rage

hatred

sharply nailed

to the gaunt of his face



the nectar drowned

so tired of it's sick taste,

twilight thru' dread window pane

pillows crouched like extreme

bandages across the face

too scared to lung manage air,

awaiting a well dressed monster

to scratch away the make believe



sweetest lie to pretend by

warmth upon a stranger's hips

or laughter in once melancholic rooms

all here are concealment glooms,

oh desert of dead affection

come enthral loneliness further

subdue what has been trapped

forever frozen labyrinth



and thru' the lantern's daze

broke jaundiced beam

a demon cripple eyed dribbles

from the waist downwards,

greasy groping teeth

insert your bleak

bite marks everywhere,

rip open whats hidden



like noose or leash

cut at the edges

to my thwarted heart



surroundings broken

word splinters thrown

shouted not spoken,

clothes colourful flags surrender

this is how i blacken

like an rank plum left

to drop from a distasteful branch

open now for your eyes to gather



and the worms to lunch



fade away please

fade away



silence now the sting is left in



like a stiffened maggot,

blood statues really glisten

none outside can listen,

"enough of the carcass" announces fiend in a suit

downstairs like an armani ogre

caricature shadows assume anger,

go corrupt another room and

leave the dust to scatter me



silence, seconds slick

i move as if hit,

the whiteness of the ceiling

loud as a far away feeling



now the floor has me in it's thrall

there is nowhere deeper to fall

as if my everywhere has fallen

think myself somewhere, timeless and inedible



do you the outside

think we are lovers?

what instructs your thought

to think of us so?



do you not see the bruises

i hide from all onlookers?

or the way i walk as if perished.

punched, scratched and kicked

lame like a splinter for a walking stick

submissive like a passive insect,

well hear my bones rattle



you may well be hard

for not understanding

the blueprints of rightfully wronged

all is grey to disappearing here,

vague appetites

resourceful in their destruction



this is why i am pale

paler than fright,

i live in a narrow house coloured beige

and sturdy skeleton fences, 33 knuckle street

where blood poppies divide the bed



i so want to tell

i so want to speak

but silence is my assassin,

mostly i daydream



why do fools pretend?

are they denying possession?

their hearts often so large

concealing the bastards in camouflage


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